I can't even begin to describe how many years I tried to get other people to approve of me, to be pleased with me or to not screw up or embarrass myself in front of them. Many times I have left a group of people or a friend only to go through what I said or did and cringe at all the stupid things I said. I was convinced they were laughing at me as soon as I left and recounting all the dumb things I said and the embarrassing things I did.
What I didn't realise at the time was that nobody really cares.
It may sound harsh but nobody gave a damn about what I said/did because they were too busy worried about themselves and how they screwed up. It took me a while to realise I wasn't THAT special, people have that much time to give a thought to all the things that were worrying me. Just as I barely thought about how they screwed up or what they did wrong.
I hope you can start to believe this and I hope it will let you become more free. You are allowed to do whatever you like because chances are whatever you do won't even be thought about as much as you fear it will be. You can allowing myself to do what you like rather than what you think people wanted you to do because the truth is that what you think people want you to do is your creation.
Everybody is too worried about themselves to really pay attention to your worries so let that free you.
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