We all are guilty of having expectations on another person. Whether it is your partner who you feel should call you if they are coming home late or the person at the shop who you believe should not cut the queue, you are constantly expecting people to act in line with your belief of how 'people should be'.
But can you really demand others meet your expectations? In the seminal book 'The Chimp Paradox', Professor Peters argues that you have to live in the real world where you cannot change how other people act. This does not mean we excuse everybody from all responsibility but ultimately it is our choice whether we will stay with and tolerate what you consider their 'weaknesses' or cut ties. If you have tried to change them many times but they are still not meeting your expectations of how they 'should' act, t is up to you whether you are going to be okay with them the way they are or cut ties.
It is unfair to impose your expectations of how another should act as these expectations are based on your world-view of what is 'right'. But what is right for you may not be right for them. They may prefer doing it their way. Or even when there is an objective 'right', it may be their desire to not act according to it.
That doesn't mean you cannot or should not bring it up. Perhaps they simply did not know they were doing it and are perfectly happy to change. But if it has caused many fights and they are refusing to change perhaps you have to realise that it is their choice not to live up to your expectations. What is your choice is whether you accept them as they are and learn to be okay with it or move on.
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