To My Bulimia,

We've been together a long time..Longer than most of the people who are currently in my life. My friends, my husband, my children...yet none of them know you exist, or perhaps you're just not someone we chose not to bring up in polite conversation.

You're an abusive lover who I can't seem to let go of, who's been around since I was a young, who I do not know who I am without, who I have shaped my life around, yet somehow have kept a secret, even though I know how bad for me you are and know I need to just quit you.

We need to go our separate ways now. Do not fight me on this or beg me to stay. I mean it.

I need to find out who I am and, in order for me to do that, I need to close this chapter in my life that has been open for far too long, taking up space in a story with a theme that doesn't fit.

This is hard, much harder for me than it is for you.

I hate to say that I'll miss you, because that's not true, not really. I won't miss you. I'll miss the illusion of control you gave me and I'll miss the empty promises and the fantasy that you'd make me and my life 'perfect' if we stay together, if I keep coming back to you, but at the end of the day, none of it was real. I won't miss having to sneak around my family and friends and making foolish excuses and covering my tracks and cleaning up behind our rendezvous feeling ashamed of myself.

I know I've said this before, but we are done. And this is the last time you'll hear from me.N

I'd love to say that I wish you the best, but truthfully, I would like it if you would burn in hell. Cheers, old "Friend"

\You understand. P