Dear Depression,

you've always been there, in many different shapes. sometimes you'd be the voices in my head telling me to end it all. Sometimes, you're the shadows in my bedroom, whispering every little mistakes i've done.

if it weren't for you, maybe i would've been happier? would i have been a little more appreciative of the people around me? maybe i would've actually enjoyed living?

But at the same time, i'm thankful for you.

You're the reason i can see through everyone. their beautiful lies, the awful truths.

Even though you've turned my once vibrant view of the world into ash greys. I'm somewhat thankful you're there. To slap me when i begin to hope for too much. when i begin to lose sight of reality, you were always there to pull me back.

I love you, and yet I also hate you.

Yours truly,

CHR