Dear ADHD,

Now, only after 22 years of living am I able to know your name. I started being aware of being different from a young age, though I shrugged it off thinking they were just personality traits.

Guess what? Even when I weren't aware of what you were I made it into med school!. By myself. Being low-class, daughter of immigrants, not in any way privileged.

I am proud of myself and proud of whom you have made me into.

Know I am failing. I am failing because I didn't know how you would grow given more time, more freedom of choices, more workload, less date-to-date homework. Now I know you are part of me. Have always been and will ever me. Soon I'll get the help I need. Soon I will become more powerful and be able to tame you.

I don't want to end this seeing you as an enemy, because I can't change what is determined by my genetics. I can only learn to control you within certain limits. I forgive you, I forgive you for all the pain you have caused me, and for all that pain that is yet to come. That pain won't be turned into suffering because I won't allow it. We need to know each other better. Then we will be able to work together. There may be times when you may want to have more limelight. I will allow it, but not always. You get to have your share, but don't demand 100% control because I won't allow it.

You are part of me, but please be aware that after falling I will come back stronger. And that will be so until we both learn to live in harmony.